The "twenty-something crisis"

We’re all too familiar with the term “mid-life crisis” and while it’s generally associated with outrageous spending, some questionable life choices and out-of-character decisions, I’ve often wondered what triggers it? If I was to guess the top 3 causes, I’d likely go with relationships, work and money, but surely there’s got to be so much more to it than that?

I have a theory, or would at least like to coin a new term called “the twenty-something crisis”. Next month I’ll be turning 24, and while many of you reading this are probably thinking “what can she possibly have to complain about at 24?”, I’m sitting here thinking “where the hell am I headed?”, which is a terrifying question because I have absolutely no idea!

I’m the kind of person that lives by the book and I’m convinced it’s just part of my DNA, much like my inability to be spontaneous. So, following high school I did what I thought was ‘right’ and went to Uni. Half way through I realised I didn’t particularly enjoy my degree but once again the ‘right’ thing to do was suck it up and finish (after all, nothing that’s worth anything ever comes easy, right?). After uni I made the best decision of my life so far and jumped on a big jet plane which took me to the most amazing parts of Europe and North America. It was an incredible but incredibly tough 18 months...and I loved it. Eventually, the adventure came to an end and I’ve now found myself working in a job I like but don’t love and wondering “what the hell am I going to do next?”

I believe there’s that point in your mid-twenties where life suddenly gets serious and you’ve got to start thinking about setting yourself up for the future. If you asked me on the day of my high school graduation where I’d be at 24, I would have confidently said something along the lines of “...pursuing a career I was passionate about and in love with an incredible man”. Idealistic and naive, you say? Perhaps, which is probably why my reality is something quite different? I’m constantly facing the daily tug of war battle in my mind of ‘do I stay where I am- living a rather complacent yet secure life, or do I go and look for something bigger and better?’

I’m convinced that the older you get, the quicker time seems to fly-by. When I was at school, the summer holidays felt like they went on for eternity, but now, I find myself counting every precious hour of my holiday allocation in the working world. Nobody wants to wake up in 5 years and think to themselves “where on earth did the time go and what do I have to show for it?” despite that exact situation happening more times than we’d probably care to admit.

I was telling my 33-year-old girlfriend the other day about my “twenty-something crisis” theory and she, like many of us, is living a very different life than what she had wished for. Marriage and babies were a big part of her plan, but with love being the one thing we can’t control, she’s found herself still looking for Mr. Right and no closer to her happily ever after. Does that make her a failure though? In my eyes, of course not!

While writing this post an important thought came to mind: “Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to replicate a ‘normal’ timeline of events, when everyone’s life is so different?” I feel incredibly lucky to be raised in a generation and world where a women’s role isn’t confined to the kitchen, nursery or domestic realm. Women today have the power and ability to shun old-school ideals and stand proud, knowing that their journey is within their own control. It’s not just ok, but evidently possible for women today to aspire to become a female Head of State, Media Mogul or CEO of a multimillion dollar company. Forbes has just released their annual World’s 100 Most Powerful Women list and I for one believe it represents the increasing strength and prominence of women in the corporate world.

When it comes to dealing with the pressures in your 20’s, or any age for that matter, perhaps we should simply sit back and enjoy our lives for the right reasons, rather than constantly comparing it to what society deems to be ‘normal’. Normal doesn’t exist- not when it comes to body image, relationships and definitely life! Maybe the sooner we adopt that line of thought, the quicker those things we desire so badly will fall into place? And in the meantime, we could all take a leaf out of Carrie Bradshaw’s book and adopt the following mentality...

“Have fun, that’s what your twenties are for, your thirties are for learning the lessons and your forties….are for paying for the drinks.”