All avenues discussed at this point were positive- I myself knew of countless women who had met men over the Internet and were now in happy, healthy relationships, with a few even stepping into marriage and others moving overseas to eliminate the long-distance.
All avenues were positive until...my friend mentioned The Game. One girl gasped instantly, acknowledging the phrase just uttered and said with a slight tone of disapproval in her voice "my boyfriend was given that as a gift". I, along with the friend sitting next to me sat there bewildered, with absolutely no clue on the reference of 'The Game' in the context of our conversation.
After a brief description, I discovered that The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists (2005) was in fact a New York Best Seller and a publication surrounded not only by controversy, but clearly countless hours of anxiety, seduction and 'game playing' experienced by my girlfriend.
She had been a victim of a 'Game Player' during her time in the online dating world and true to form, as the confident, gutsy, opinionated and unforgiving woman I know she is, she refused to let the incident slide. She didn't fight dirty, just smart. She used the very ammunition that men had been firing at her for years by educated herself on the principles and rules described in the book. She had become an attractive woman with a man's thought process and combined, was indestructible in the emotional juggernaut of the dating world. The Game, she explained, wasn't about men finding girlfriends, wives or life-long partners, but instead it was a secret boys club where the currency came in the form of female conquests and one night stands. Getting a girls phone number was worth a certain number of points, getting her to a bar or on a date was worth a different number and getting her to bed was the slam dunk! It was a game driven by testosterone, competitiveness and ego.
Now, I am a very 'glass half full' kind of thinker and I choose to believe that good reigns over bad in most instances, so for me to believe that there was a society of men who's aim is to use and emotionally abuse women kind of made me think twice about a lot of things- online dating included.
Maybe Neil Strauss, the author of The Game was simply a forward thinker? I mean, following the release of his book came the films Hitch staring Will Smith as a dating coach, He's Just Not That Into You, based on another best selling book by Greg Behrendt and recently, Crazy Stupid Love. All of which were huge successes both on the shelf and at the box office.
So what does it all say about men, women and the dating world in general? I suppose we're all just curious on the psyche of the opposite sex (think What Women Want) and are willing to get a 'leg-up' on the competition wherever we can in our personal bid to find a partner, a lover or a companion. While I have no doubt that most men (and yes, perhaps women) have used a 'tactic' mentioned in The Game without even knowing it, I'm still a romantic at heart and choose to believe that serendipity exists and that real love happens the real way.
No comments:
Post a Comment