Firstly, I must apologize for having failed to post in almost 2 months. I have been (and am still on) an incredible traveling holiday, which has taken me from North Africa, through Europe and in a few weeks to North America.
While I had every intention of posting regular updates of my adventures, the days just seem to pass by so quickly, that after the social media updates, email replies and travel journal entries, there hasn't been much time to dedicate to the blog.
But, fear not, I'm missing the blogosphere too much to stay away, so over the next few weeks I'll be sharing little snippets of my experiences and highlights in the places I've travelled thus far.
This entry is coming to you fresh from Paris, and although its my second time visiting the city, it is still just as impressive and magnificent as the first time I laid eyes on it.
[ sometimes on holiday, you´ve just got to kick up your feet ]
Until my next post, I hope that life is treating you as kindly as it is me.
A few of my closest girlfriends and I recently caught up for coffee and unsurprisingly, it didn't take us long to get onto the topic of men, love and relationships. We're all at the age now where people we went to school with are starting to get engaged, married, pregnant or all of the above, which got me thinking about the paths we choose to take after high school finishes and 'real life' begins.
In my mind, our mid-twenties is a time best used to 'find' yourself, to make stupid mistakes and brush them off as 'life experience' and a time when it's somewhat acceptable to browse the male market in search of someone worth holding onto. While twenty-something is still incredibly young in the context of a lifetime, when your classmates begin taking that next step, you can't help but wonder if you're underachieving in the subject of romance? Perhaps the only thought scarier to me, as dramatic as it may sound, is the possibility of feeling this way in another 10 years time!
Going around the table, my girlfriends and I began throwing out the classic one-liners that we constantly seem to hear. "You're too fussy" is fired at me all the time, while one friend gets "You always go for the wrong guy", another "Aren't you afraid you'll end up alone" and finally "I know you want to be a young mum, but what if that doesn't happen?" When we listed them all together, it was a powerful little box of ammunition.
When I looked over at my gorgeous, successful and intelligent friends, I wondered whether or not we were the problem? We are, admittedly, quite a confident and intimidating group of women, but were we simply scared by past romances and carrying the burden of previous heartache into possible new relationships? Were we the ones sending out the wrong signals? In my personal opinion, when it comes to love, women tend to be stupid. In fact, I would almost go as far as to say, that in this area of life, men often have the upper hand.
Now, I'm not saying that all women are innocent or all men are the enemy, but I've heard one too many stories (and at times been the star of the tale) about women who ignore the red flags in a relationship in the hope that their gut instincts are a little off target. I learnt the hard way that your instincts are always right, but we just seem to forget that fact because love inhibits our ability to think rationally! And then we get hurt.
So why do women think we can ignore the red flags and still have the happily ever after we so desperately desire? Perhaps in a twisted way, we're attracted to the challenge? When men look at a red flag, they think things like "she's too hard", "too high maintenance", "too much baggage", whereas women look and think "I can be the one to change him"...and so our attempt begins.
I've tried to change an ex's views on a vast array of issues and while it was a slow and tough lesson to learn, I now understand that in most instances, people don't change. If a person lies, cheats or disappoints you once, chances are they'll have no problem doing it again. In fact, women going into a relationship expecting to be able to change someone, I believe are setting themselves up for heartache. Although I thought the movie was terrible, the book He's Just Not That Into You is sheer brilliance. Its honest, it's brutal and it's a dose of reality that so many women, including myself, need to hear from time to time.
I've had girlfriends who have tried to make their partners less racist, more eloquent, ready for a relationship...or a puppy...or marriage...or children...or at times, them! All roads in these cases have led to disappointment and when your friend continues to go back for more, all you can do is sit on the sidelines and in most cases, wait for the fallout with open arms.
I remember asking my parents one day what they believed the key was to their 28 years of marriage? Their answers were simple and consistent- compromise. "You can't go into a relationship expecting to be able to change a person, you have to accept them for who they are and compromise to create a situation you're both comfortable with. That and communication is the key" replied my dad. I knew instantly, his words were wise ones.
When it comes to love, sometimes women are just waiting to hear things like...
...and to know it came from a place of honesty.
And finally, to remain somewhat unbiased, I do often feel sorry for men. How are they supposed to know what women really want, when we can't even answer that questions ourselves!
Last week while driving home from work, I sifted through an old pile of CD's in my car and came across Craig David's album Born To Do It.
Instantly, my eyes lit up as I put the CD on and turned up the volume. Luckily for me it was dark, because if anyone else driving saw me singing along to that album, they would have thought I was trying to impersonate one of Tina Turners backup singers...it couldn't have been a pretty sight! I was singing very loud, very out of tune and I was very 'in the groove', but I was also very surprised to realise I still knew about 95% of the lyrics.
I think this fact can be attributed to the countless years during my teenage life that the CD was blasted on repeat, but regardless, having not heard the album for at least a year before that night, I still couldn't believe how quickly it all came back.
What also came back was the memory of my total and utter crush for Craig David. I'm actually fairly confident a magazine clipping of him was stuck firmly to the cover of my year 9 school diary.
Reminiscing aside, that drive home reminded me just how good Born To Do It actually was and how much I still enjoyed singing along to the smooth RnB tracks of the British singer today. With hits such as 7 Days, Rendezvous and Walking Away, I'm sure I could play that album to all of my school friends and without a moment's hesitation, have us singing along and acting like we were 14 again.
And just as a side note, I can't talk about Craig David without mentioning my beautiful godsister, Nicole, who is perhaps the only other person I know still pressing play on her own copy of Born To Do It. She's a girl after my own heart!
BORN TO DO IT 1. Fill Me In 2. Can’t Be Messing ‘Round 3. Rendezvous 4. 7 Days 5. Follow Me 6. Key To My Heart 7. Fill Me In (Part 2) 8. Last Night 9. Walking Away 10. Time to Party 11. Booty Man 12. Once in a Lifetime 13. You Know What 14. Rewind
Last week, Seal (as in the ex Mr Heidi Klum and the only man I know who can rock neon yellow nail polish), performed in my home city.
It was a cozy, intimate show with plenty of interaction between the crooner and his fans. He sang a mix of old hits such as Kiss by a Rose, Crazy and Amazing, combined with tracks off his new album Soul, (including my personal favourite, It's a Man's Man's Man's World). In my opinion, it was nice to see a show which was more about the music than all the flashy stage productions that many artists welcome with open arms.
With all that being said, this post was never meant to be a blurb for Seal's fan page, but rather a look into the lives of the rich and famous...
Upon arriving at work that night, I was introduced to Seal's PA, who told me that he would not be consuming anything that evening, except a special detox drink. In the scheme of things I've seen, heard and experienced during my time working backstage at an entertainment venue, Seal's request was a surprisingly normal one, so I didn't think much of it.
Soon after, I was sent out on a mission to find more lemons for this detox cocktail and when I returned to the dressing rooms, I found his PA elbow deep in lemon juice, with a jar of maple syrup and a bag of cayenne pepper within close proximity. I put two and two together and cautiously asked if Seal was on the same diet Beyonce made famous when trying to loose weight for her role in the film, Dreamgirls? The PA looked at me, smiled, and confirmed my assumption, but also added that now, most of Hollywood have tried the Lemon and Cayenne Pepper detox diet at one point or another.
A couple of women I know who have attempted this detox only lasted a few of days, rather than the recommended 10-14, before they began to feel the effects of no protein, no carbs and well, no food. I saw their moods change, their energy levels drop and their concentration plummet. Its not a detox for the faint hearted, but lets be honest, it's got to be a hell of a lot easier to do when you a) have an assistant to make the fiddly drinks for you; b) spend your life bouncing from a plane to a hotel room to a stage (at the most); and c) don't actually have to get up and work the standard 9-5 day in, day out.
Now, I'm not saying that celebrities don't work hard or have the same pressures and responsibilities as us ordinary folk, but there's no denying that life has to be easier when you have the funds and the help to make these 'luxury lifestyle choices' work. I mean, if I had a world class personal trainer kicking my butt every morning, followed by a chef doing my grocery shopping and preparing my meals as well as a stylist making sure I looked the part, I have no doubt I'd be fit and fabulous enough to make the cover of a popular magazine too.
I am, by admission, a lover, consumer and reader of glossy gossip magazines. I own subscriptions and I'm 'that' person at the supermarket checkout who constantly gets tempted by the bountiful display while waiting in line. I also have a journalism degree though, and fully acknowledge that most of what I read is untrue and involves little to no investigative reporting. However, despite all this, I still can't help but devour a magazine whenever I get the chance and although I take the 'facts' with a grain of salt, I'm not surprised that we are becoming a society with increasing mental health problems and unhealthy perceptions of body image.
When we see our favourite celebrities walking the red carpet or acting on screen, we've all had that moment when we think to ourselves "she's perfect!" or "I would do anything to look like her". What's terrifying however, is that these women that society considers to be some of the most beautiful in the world, are still subjected to harsh photo retouching. As if these gorgeous people aren't gorgeous enough, they're automatically propelled into the stratosphere of perfection, which is detrimental to us all because it's 100% unattainable.
You need only to look at the examples below to realise that perfection only comes with the help of computer software.
With the help of social media, we are also now more connected to our favourite celebrities than ever before. Last week Lady Gaga tweeted “Just killed back to back spin classes. Eating a salad dreaming of a cheeseburger.” with the hash tag #PopSingersDontEat.
The comment sparked outrage around the world by critics, haters and fans alike. My personal view on the matter, is that Gaga simply stated the truth in outlining the kinds of lifestyle choices and 'sacrifices' celebrities have no choice but to make. The media love to endorse a beautiful, young starlet eating a piece of chocolate cake, but in the same week are just as happy to slam her for an imperfect bikini shot.
I've heard Miley Cyrus turn down a fun size snickers bar because she was 'getting fat and needed to watch her weight' and I've seen Joel Madden encourage Nicole Richie to eat a small bowl of salad leaves during her infamously skinny days. The pressure on these women to look 'perfect' is immense, and its nice to hear people like Gaga tell it how it really is, regardless of how politically and socially sensitive it may be.
The truth of the matter is, the media combined with people like myself are the ones adding fuel to the fire. I'm intrigued by a catchy headline and attracted to a glossy editorial and if it weren't for those who consume the media's jargon, then it would be an industry in decline, rather than a rapid increase.
On a side note: At the Logie Awards a few nights ago (Australia's equivalent to the Golden Globes), comedian Hamish Blake commented on Facebook that Seal (who was on the next table) had kept his back turned to the food that night. Despite everything I mentioned above, I suppose the one thing we can all learn is that wealth can not buy will power.
The one thing I love more than Kim Kardashian's style, is a perfectly tailored statement blazer. So when you combine the two, you've pretty much got my style inspiration rolled into one.
The fact is, the majority of my wardrobe consists of either black, white, gray or neutral tones, so it's no surprise that my go-to pieces are bold blazers with a statement necklace. Ever since seeing Kim fashion this A.L.C. Zoe mint green blazer (because don't we all look this good while putting petrol in our cars?), I've been on the hunt for a cheaper alternative to add to my collection.
Although I'll be travelling during the Australian winter and will therefore have back to back summers, I'm still determined to scope out some inexpensive yet fabulously bright blazers to add to my collection.
I'm thinking this orange jacket from the Kardashian Kollection could be a good place to start, even though I'll have to hang out until May for it's release. Well, there's either that, or I could visit their store in Las Vegas and peruse the collection first hand.
Today marks the 1 month countdown until my next big overseas adventure begins and as you can imagine, I'm just a little bit excited!
I'm going with two A-Class travel buddies, known to me as Alina and Nadia and the first three stops on our trip are Dubai, followed by Egypt and then Morocco. Having just come out of an Australian Summer, I feel as though I'm as well prepared for the harsh heat of North Africa and Southern Europe as I can be, but my wardrobe tells a very different story.
In Australia, when the weather gets hot, people tend to simply wear less clothing to compensate, but that couldn't be further from the reality in the countries we're visiting.
So, by taking a little inspiration from the second Sex and the City film (and yes, I concur, it was horrible), I've put together an inspiration board to get my girlfriends and I in the mood for Sahara chic dressing...and shopping. I'm thinking bright, bold colours, white cotton pants, big beautiful gold jewelry and of course, kaftans! I might however, leave my sequined turban at home (sorry Carrie, but that's a little too much!).
Egypt in particular, has been a country I've always dreamt of visiting and if my obsession with the pyramids and my childhood ambition to become a Egyptologist (it lasted until I realised they spend their days digging in dirt and sand) are anything to go by, I'm sure it's going to be an experience of a lifetime, no matter what I wear!
There are some images that just have to be shared, and this is one of them.
Shot by photographer Rodney Smith this photograph had me at hello.
Carrie Bradshaw once said "Year after year, twenty-something women come to New York City in search of the two L's: labels and love" and well, this photo ticks both boxes.
Here are some other favourites I've discovered in Rodney Smith's portfolio.
Disclaimer: This post is a little deep, so don't say I didn't warn you...
While having a conversation with my boss last week, she turned to me and said "has anyone ever told you that you're an old soul?"
Considering the previous topics of conversation had been bland, work related discussions, this question had come straight out of left field. It was, however, a much more appealing subject so I happily replied with a modest "yes, people have been saying that to me my whole life".
After a brief discussion, I left the meeting and returned to my desk, where I reflected on what had just occurred. My boss- a strong, savvy and intelligent woman 25-30 years my senior, had just given me one of the most flattering compliments I could have asked for.
To be considered an 'old soul' may seem a little weird to some, but to me it was an accurate representation of how I feel about myself, who I am as a person and more importantly, how I am perceived by others.
If I'm being honest, I can't remember a time in my life when my mind felt on par with my numerical age. It was never a matter of academic intelligence, but rather maturity. At 14 I felt as though I was 16. At 16 I was 19 and now, at 24 I feel like my mind is in a place far beyond my years.
I have never been into the typical things that girls my age were squealing about or crying about or thinking about. I'm not a big drinker, so that element alone vastly impacted my adolescence and I have never felt the pressure to conform to trending social behaviours or attitudes.
When I got home later that day, I asked my mum if during my early years, I always been that way? I suppose I wanted to know if it was quintessentially me, or whether I had taught myself to think a certain way throughout the years? My mum, without a moments hesitation, replied with a definite "yes". She went on to say that even as a baby, people had told her that I looked wise, like I'd lived before.
All this talk of age and souls reminded me of one of my favourite scenes from the film Before Sunrise. These were Jessie's (Ethan Hawke) thoughts on the theory of past lives and eternal souls...
"... 50,000 years ago, there are not even a million people on the planet. 10,000 years ago, there's, like, two million people on the planet. Now there's between five and six billion people on the planet, right? Now, if we all have our own, individual, unique soul, where do they all come from? You know, are modern souls only a fraction of the original souls? 'Cause if they are, that represents a 5,000 to 1 split of each soul in the last 50,000 years, which is a blip in the Earth's time. You know, so at best we're like these tiny fractions of people, you know, just walking... I mean, is that why we're so scattered?"
I find this a very interesting concept and although it's one that I'm sure would be torn apart by religious believers, I do think there's some truth to the theory. Maybe dejavu exists because we see something in our present that reminds us of our past, yet why can't we seem to put our finger on when it happened? Sometimes our gut instincts tell us to make decisions that don't quite add up, but we find it impossible to ignore the overwhelming sense of it being either right or wrong. There are those times throughout our lives when we pick up a skill or learn something new and people comment by saying "you're such a natural". Is it our born ability to do specific things well, or maybe a tiny fraction of someone else's skill and soul? And while we may be scattered if you compare it to the rising statistics in mental illnesses, we are also a race getting more intelligent as the generations progress.
What if all these feelings and emotions stem from a far deeper place? What if they are merely a reflection of the lives we once lived?
Today's post is a little sporadic, but I've recently discovered a few things that I thought I'd share...
Last night I went to the movies and saw The Hunger Games. Now, as someone who was never a fan of Harry Potter, Twilight or most fictional stories for that matter, I thoroughly enjoyed the film and it's unique balance of a post-apocalyptic world and fantasy. I must admit, the beginning of the film left a sour taste in my mouth, as the herding of children and teens to attend an involuntary ballot to represent their district and likely die, reminded me of something I'd seen in a confronting Holocaust film. Then there's the concept of killing purely for the entertainment of the wealthy and privileged, as if the Gladiator contests of ancient Rome were televised with minute by minute commentary and betting. I must admit, it was, at times a little unnerving, but the the concept in itself is nothing short of unique. The privileged citizens display fashions which resembled those seen in Alice in Wonderland and just like all popular movies, there is a love triangle which softens this story from the gore and killing which is prominent throughout.
With this film being the first in a trilogy, it will be interesting to see whether or not it's strong opening box office figures can rival those of the wizards and vampires of recent years.
In other news, as soon as I saw this clutch via Pinterest, I almost died. Ah-mazing!
[ you can follow me on Pinterest by clicking here ]
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And for the wedding I will one day have, this photo has gone straight to the top of my inspiration list. Words can not even begin to describe how beautiful I think this is...
A colleague at work shared this photo of his pregnant daughter and I thought it was just beautiful. My mind immediately went to party planning and I think it would make a gorgeous theme for a baby shower. Superheroes anyone?
Each year, there are a few lists that I look forward to reading. There's TIME magazine's Most Influential People, Barbara Walters Most Fascinating People, People magazines Most Beautiful People and Forbes magazines World's Billionaires List.
This year, among a pool of telecommunication service providers, apparel giants, mining titan's and technology inventors, Sara Blakely, the youngest self-made billionaire and creator of the undergarment SPANX, not only made the list, but also the cover of the anticipated editorial. As a woman, I am a huge fan of the product itself and also of the fact that Sara managed to build her business from a mere $5,000. She avoided needing help from outside investors, dodged debt and never put a cent towards conventional advertising. Instead, her product spoke for itself and has now changed the lives of everyday fashionistas around the world.
In an elite class dominated by men, Sara is an amazing role model for women and small business owners alike. Sometimes it's easy to discourage those on the list who inherit their fortunes, but in this case, Sara is there because of a small idea that grew into a modern day necessity.
There are so many things I love about putting together these 'wish list' collage boards. It's partly the feeling of shopping withouth actually spending any money. Another part is putting together a fantasy wardrobe, and for me, I love the challenge of seeing these beautiful (and pricy) items and trying to find cheaper alternatives in my local mall or high street.
So stay tuned for my take on some of these items, as I begin my hunt to add a few to my wardrobe...
