October 17, 2012

Excess Baggage...



Coming back from a holiday always leaves me in an interesting head-space. Maybe my adventures put my life back home into perspective? Maybe I am reminded of what and who are truly important in life? Maybe I feel like my return is an opportunity for a fresh start, new goals and alters in my behaviour or routine?

I am a firm believer that in order for us to grow and become more self aware, we must constantly remember to spring clean our lives. Out with the old and in with the new. Or at least getting rid of that excess baggage that can sometimes weigh us down.

Here are some big bags of ‘stuff’ that I believe myself and every woman needs to ditch in order to move onwards and upwards...

High maintenance friends-

You know the ones. They’re the ladies you went to school with or knew from an old workplace who you reluctantly catch up with, despite fully knowing that when you leave, you’ll be burdened with not only your own problems, but also theirs. It’s usually a conversation completely consumed by their news, whether it be good or bad and for countless reasons, you find them emotionally draining. Now, I’m not saying that this person is bad or unworthy of your friendship, but I think we all need to acknowledge that as time goes by, people change and so do our relationships with them. New partners, different careers, other priorities in life are all things that change a person, and sometimes, it leads us to gradually grow apart. The one thing I’ve certainly noticed since leaving high school, university and different work environments, is that despite my network of acquaintances becoming bigger and bigger with each new experience, the list of people I choose to invest time seeing has decreased. My dad always says that when you die, if you can confidently count your best friends on one hand, than you’ve led a good life. When I was at school, I used to think he was crazy. Only 5 friends, that’s absurd considering I invited over 250 people to my 18th birthday party. But now as I’ve matured and know which friends will stick by me no matter what, I have come to the conclusion that only 5 may in fact be the perfect number.


Your “skinny” clothes-

We’ve all trawled through the running rails at our favourite store and found an item we instantly love. Except, it’s a size smaller than what we’re currently wearing. Personally, my cupboard is full of great clothes with the tags still hanging pretty, just waiting for the day when my butt no longer looks like Nikki Minaj’s. As I stare into a cupboard full of clothes I haven’t yet worn, part of me thinks “I’m going to look so good in this dress one day”, while the other side calculates all the money I would have saved if I’d refrained from fantasy purchases. I think it’s important to have a pair of skinny jeans, because let’s face it, every woman has them, but there does come a point when you have to spring clean your closet and unfortunately, those unworn, too big or too small items just don’t make the cut. I’d prefer to sell them online or give them to an appropriate friend, sister or relative. Besides, by the time I’m likely to fit into them, the fashion world will surely turn its nose up at my “so last season” dress and well, what’s the point in that?


Social media clean out-

I use social media every day. I don’t see the problem jumping online while you’re sitting in traffic or the ads are on during your favourite TV show. But I do think that most of us are guilty of having more Facebook friends and twitter followers than we really need or in many cases, want. If your anything like me, every time I come back from a holiday, I end up with a large number of ‘friends’ I met on a tour or through my travels that I don’t actually want to be friends with. Sure, I may have spent 2 hours with someone in a hot air balloon in Marrakesh, but am I ever going to see that person again, probably not. I think culling your Facebook friend list is a good thing, not a mean one, because let’s be honest, I don’t need to know what everyone ate for breakfast today.

Office clutter-

In today’s world, emails form the backbone of all office administration and correspondence. Opening an email account is one of the first things I do when I get to work every day, and I usually spend half my time replying, forwarding or constructing emails. I remember my uncle saying that emails were meant to be the beginning of the paperless office, but I’ve had colleagues who still insist on printing everything and are swamped with paperwork! Now, part of me understands the need to press the print button, because I too am a hard copy girl. I like to be able to scribble notes in the margins or highlight parts of a text, but without a proper filing system, the paper trail can get out of control. I used to work for an Executive Director and the amount of work he chomped through on a daily basis was ridiculous. His approach to dealing with emails and paper clutter was simple. He adopted and passed onto me the RAFT System. You just decided whether to Read it, Action it, File it or Toss it. Trust me, it works!

The Ex-

Maintaining a relationship with an ex boyfriend can be hard, even at the best of times. The truth is, you broke up with them for a reason and although it may have been an amicable ending, there’s usually still feelings floating around long after you’ve parted ways. One of my very close friends unquestionably gets an A+ for opening herself up to new relationships and opportunities, despite the fact she’s more often than not the one who ends up being hurt. I love her commitment towards finding ‘the one’ but I also believe her greatest downfall sometimes is her inability to let go of guys who have proved time and time again that they don’t deserve her. She’s one of the kindest people I know and she still catches up with certain Ex’s for weekly coffees and lunches, but I fear that by not letting them go, she’s not able to completely move on. Whether its continued heartache or just having them take up space in her conscious mind, I do believe that there comes a point where you have to step back and say “I’m worth more than this. I’m out!”

Bad eating habits-

Do you skip breakfast? Indulge in too many glasses of wine each night? Find it hard not to raid the kitchen cupboards for a late night snack? Or maybe you just don't eat enough of the 'good stuff'? We all have bad eating habits and they're equally as hard to get rid of regardless of how much will power you have. Lately I've been feeling lethargic and tired, despite getting enough sleep every night and having reduced stress levels at work. I know what I have to do to start feeling better, and it's as simple as what types of food I put into my body and at what time of the day I choose to do it. Our bodies are incredible machines, but they're really not that complicated. A change up in your diet and exercise routine is generally all it takes to start feeling better. All you (and I) have to do is start.

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